Just Plane Fun (Thanksgiving Edition)

  With the holiday travel season approaching, many of us anxiously await those dreaded travel days filled with impossibly long airport lines, invasive pat downs, exorbitant airline fees, and so much else that has stolen the joy from the flying experience.  In an effort to brighten up the many hours wasted in transit, we bring…

STM News: Obama Compromises Again

Obama Caves, Lets Dog Sleep in Bed Despite his long-held and frequently articulated position that it would “never happen in a million years,” President Obama reached a compromise late last night, allowing the family dog, Bo, to climb into bed with him and the First Lady.  After a long night spent whimpering on the cold floor…

Cyber-Monday not at all what it sounded like

Nation’s pervs disappointed; Cyber Monday not at all what it sounded like Perverts everywhere were left disheartened and misled this week as the much-anticipated Cyber Monday proved to be nothing at all what it sounded like.  Totally unaware of Cyber Monday’s reputation as a day of online holiday shopping, thousands of 40-65 year-old men and women…

Was New Orleans Water Plant Intentionally Sabotaged?

New Orleans drinking water safely restored; villain warns “you haven’t seen the last of the Penguin” An investigation by the New Orleans Sewage and Water Board has revealed that the crisis that shut down the city’s drinking water supply last weekend, was, as many suspected, the work of the criminal mastermind the Penguin.  Late Friday night…

STM News: Notes from the Recession (Candy Crisis)

Amid pedophile shortage, local stores struggle to unload post-Halloween candy surplus “They certainly don’t make ’em like they used to,” says shop owner Gary Daniels.   A cheerful and slightly graying man of 74, Daniels is owner of the Daniels’ Family Sweet Shop.  Surveying his shelves sagging under the weight of dusty un-purchased bulk bags of fun-size…